By: Bill Waters - Staff Writer
Published: Jun 16, 2021

Best Political Jokes and One Liners

The best political jokes and one liners. These one liner jokes are more funny because some of them were actual statements made. I don’t even think they planned to say some of these things, but they are really hilarious.

“The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.” - Will Rogers

“In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known.” - Thomas Pickering

“I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty.” - Nancy Reagan

“When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer ‘Present’ or ‘Not guilty.’” - Theodore Roosevelt

“Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.” - Doug Larson

“Today’s public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can’t read them either.” - Gore Vidal

“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it wrongly, and applying unsuitable remedies.” - Sir Ernest Benn

“On my arrival in the United States I was struck by the degree of ability among the governed and the lack of it among the governing.” - Alexis de Toqueville

“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.” - Ernest Benn

“There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.” - Will Rogers

“Politicians make strange bedfellows, but they all share the same bunk.” - Edgar A. Shoaff

“You can fool all of the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough.” - Joseph Levine

“Artificial hearts are nothing new. Politicians have had them for years.” - Mack McGinnis

“Don’t vote. You’ll only encourage them.” - Anon


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