The best political jokes and one liners. These one liner jokes are more funny because some of them were actual statements made. I don’t even think they planned to say some of these things, but they are really hilarious.
“The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.” - Will Rogers
“In archaeology you uncover the unknown. In diplomacy you cover the known.” - Thomas Pickering
“I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty.” - Nancy Reagan
“When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer ‘Present’ or ‘Not guilty.’” - Theodore Roosevelt
“Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.” - Doug Larson
“Today’s public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can’t read them either.” - Gore Vidal
“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it wrongly, and applying unsuitable remedies.” - Sir Ernest Benn
“On my arrival in the United States I was struck by the degree of ability among the governed and the lack of it among the governing.” - Alexis de Toqueville
“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy.” - Ernest Benn
“There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.” - Will Rogers
“Politicians make strange bedfellows, but they all share the same bunk.” - Edgar A. Shoaff
“You can fool all of the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough.” - Joseph Levine
“Artificial hearts are nothing new. Politicians have had them for years.” - Mack McGinnis
“Don’t vote. You’ll only encourage them.” - Anon